Nobody likes a canker sore

pictures

2006-07-06T19:34:00.000-06:00

me being all artsy and whatnot

Taken by my home in Northern Arm

St. John's

Once again, back home. The remains of an old treehouse me and my neighbors tried building. It wasn't bad...about as complete as anything we ever did.

I've gotta fool around with my camera some more. I find that - on a bright day - the sky comes out pinkish

Vacation Time Just East of the Maritimes

2006-06-29T06:16:00.000-06:00

It ryhmes.
Get used to it. It's how I run things around here.

Being quite aware that nobody will probably read this (because I've basically told everyone to stop reading this), I have decided to write anyway. I'm - just - that - crazy.

I'm gonna skip all the stuff about how beautiful the weather is, and what I've been in to, and where I've up to, and all the usual vacation fare.

I "feel" a little different.
I think my mindset has changed, in a good way, if you wanna pick sides. I'm hoping that this will carry over when I return to work in Edmonton (which doesn't really exist right now - just when I get there. If I get there.) But, I'm a little concerned that once I hit the mind-dissolving routine of work and day-to-day life I'll slip.
I hate the feeling of desperation, but when the bills pile up and the creditcards eat at your
soul, I'll probably forget that I was ever in Newfoundland this summer.

I've a confession to make: I've not thought of you until this very moment when I had to go ruin it by checking your blogatories. I've not thought of work, or anything to do with edmonton. It feels like I've been here a very long time.
Alberta was all just a dream. I don't actually have a job to go to in EDMONTON, do I? And I don't actually have to go there on Teusday. right? THIS Teusday?

CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
CHANGE CHANGE CHANGE
damnit! CHANGE!!!!!!!!!!

hot change will do you good

2006-04-12T07:31:00.000-06:00

I always heard those words when that song would play

"a little hot change will do you good"

I've heard it so much in my head over the past however many years, that I don't think I will ever hear it otherwise.

so, here's a little hot change for you
I'm not gonna be posting here very much anymore.
I have to pick my battles, you see.

I can't have three battles going on at once, it's confusing.

I have a new website -> www.thekirk.ca
there's a blog of sorts there

I have a myspace ---> http://www.myspace.com/majorkirk
both have BLOGS, though I probably won't use the latter one.

I may still post my most innane and inappropriate thoughts here. So I won't delete it for a while

word

hey, guys, I'm pregnant

2006-04-01T08:45:00.000-07:00

I'm a preggo, and this time I'm not referring to spagetti sauce.
I got knocked up...real old school.

yup...that's me. Look what I've gotten myself into this time, gang!
oh, silly me!

Oh

and by the way....

just as an aside

.
.
.
.

April fools, bitches!

I really had you all going.

oh, my.
but I guess nobody will read this until after noon (i.e. in the afteroon) when - for whatever reason - the april fooler becomes incapacitated.
But I can totally claim retroactive tom-foolery here

Cake or Death?

2006-03-31T18:37:00.000-07:00

I chose Molasses Cake
and I did a decent job. My first time and, if I must say so myself, it ain't far off mom's best.
once I figure out how to make her blueberry pudding w/ brown sugar sauce, I'll have no more need for her.

No Sweeter Pain

2006-03-26T13:37:00.000-07:00

This ones a little out of character, I suppose. And it doesn't really draw on any personal experience, since I've never really had a relationship with a femme fatale!

When she sees the blood, she comes rushing for the kill
There's nothing left to me when she's done
But I've had my share of poison
it's a wonder I can stand
So when the claws come out I open up my arms

There's no better fire to burn you
Than when you get your precious heart torn in two
This hollow melody echoes true
now, can't you see
There's no sweeter pain, more holy shame
to haunt your memory

When she smells fear, she can tell just where I am
All I see is red, but I'm as pale as a ghost
The world may not revolve around me
but it sure spins awful fast
There's blood in my eyes, she saves the worst for last

Future Goals #4 (I think)

2006-03-25T19:50:00.000-07:00

I want to be chased by a killer, make it to my door, and fumble with my keys like an idiot. Will I get in at the last minute?
who knows?

Last Supper

2006-03-19T14:31:00.000-07:00

This is where my father lays
deep in divine sleep
This is where my mother prays
for the soul of her lost sheep
and this is where I shot a man for looking at me wrong
I can hear my mother weeping all night long

Here is where I made her proud
the memory never fades
Her tears that day were freed by joy
Her words were filled with praise
then they brought me my last meal
her famous specialty
but they made it wrong
too dry, too cold, and too hard

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/view/01/default.cfm?bandID=190327&content=music

lazy afternoons

2006-03-12T17:30:00.000-07:00

I was just sitting down and zoning out to music...being completely lazy and unproductive. Then I decided to take some pictures.

gratuitous?

looking longingly out the window from my "sofa"

spiderman is not impressed

unidentifable flesh

In The Corner of My Eye

2006-03-12T16:49:00.000-07:00

I'm coming down, my dear
coming down never seemed so hard

I'm leaving here
but leaving never seemed so wrong

Midnight - the new year
These parking lots never seemed so empty

and then I saw tomorrow in the corner of my eye

Goodnight, my friend
goodbyes never seemed so long

I'm leaving here
but leaving never felt so wrong

and then I saw tomorrow in the corner of my eye

watch - don't you blink
Something may pass you by
but you know it won't be me
I lay awake last night
for fear of what might
happen if I closed my eyes

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Nighttime is The Artist

2006-03-05T16:30:00.000-07:00

I didn't spend a lot of time on recording this just right...so it probably sounds a tad rough

The Artist

When daylight breaks color fills the sky
a waking world sheds its disguise
everything will move along the lines that we have drawn
and how it hangs on the wall
every rise and every fall

The warmth in the sun has brought the city to its feet
a pulse and a heartbeat to the sidewalks and the street
and everything is posed within the frames of my window
and how it hangs on the wall
hangs for us all

When the sun has set no one sees the scars
Our eyes are gazing out connecting every blinking star
lovers return home
the lonesome left alone
and those in between
are wandering
aimlessly

Thoughts take center stage there's nowhere else they can go
These hours can be a blessing or a curse
It's when all the lines start crossing
and all the lights get brighter
For good or bad
the curtains close
If day is a painting - Nighttime is the artist

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/view/01/default.cfm?bandID=190327&content=music

smile

2006-03-05T10:06:00.000-07:00

When marc posted the video for the short story smile, it reminded me of one of my favorite animations.

also called smile - and, yes, it is disturbing also
http://www.deviantart.com/view/6966135/

it's the little things

2006-02-27T19:29:00.000-07:00

like what happened to my milk carton when I tried to open it

<-------do you see this?

<-------SEE IT?!?!

how could I mess up that so badly? there's no way, it was the milk cartons fault. I think the glue they used was too strong

Something new

2006-02-25T09:55:00.000-07:00

something new

HA HAH A HA

my v-day tradition

2006-02-14T18:07:00.000-07:00

well...this special time of the year has come around again!!

everyone is just so full of love love love

ever since that valentines day is grade 6 when I brought my cardboard heart home empty, I have celebrated my v-day a little differently than most people.

I start the day off with a stiff drink. (when I was younger it would be homogenized milk)
throughout the day I try to ruin the occasion for as many happy couples as possible.
Maybe write a love letter to some girl and put it in her purse, hoping that her boyfriend will find it

stuff like that

I end the day by killing a rabbit and drinking its blood from the hallowed out skull of last years rabbit

I know...it's a pretty humble little celebration, but it's something!

Why?

2006-02-11T13:06:00.000-07:00

I was thinking the thing the world of music really needs is another song of lost love. There's really not a lot of them is there?

One more beer before I go to sleep
Maybe more, a drunk never dreams
there's a writing on the wall
I wrote it there last night
It says, "Why did I ever let you go?"

I know I had my reasons
but I can't recall them now
and the pictures that kept me smiling
are now filling me with doubt
By the time the sun has risen
I'm goddam tired of asking
"why did I ever let you go"

I know that I should try to leave these thoughts alone
But I just can't shake this cold and lonely feeling
Morning is calling but I won't answer her now
There are birds outside my window singing some sad old country song

I thought this time was different
I thought this time I'd follow through
But I know this time was different
that's why I didn't know what to do
and I know I had my reasons
but I can't recall them now
"why did I ever let you go?"

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Future Goals #3

2006-02-04T17:51:00.000-07:00

I want to say goodbye to somebody, and as I'm walking off into the sunset I want to stop several times, slowly turn my head, and look back at them with a blank, slightly contented look on my face, as if to say...'my time here is done, I hope your days are as sweet as they are numerous"

Future goals #2

2006-01-28T20:02:00.000-07:00

I want to say "it's not you, it's me" to someone at some point in the future

Empty Glass

2006-01-21T13:16:00.000-07:00

Empty glass on the table
You're unable
To remember what you drank
before the phone rang

But all that matters
in the pig picture
is how many pills
were in the mixture
and will this be your last night

And who was on the other line
When you hit the floor?
Twitched and foamed
and screamed for help
then spoke no more

There was a light in the tunnel
So you walked towards it
then started running
you had to see it
you had to hold it

Strange faces began to loom
when the light you found
was a hospital room
Then you saw your family
they were rejoicing

But it made you think
what would have happened
if you turned your back
on the light
would there be another?
or would there be nothing?

But who's to say?
who really cares?
when all you have is found right here
why would you search for lights or tunnels or nothing at all?

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/view/01/default.cfm?bandID=190327&content=music

Voting

2006-01-20T22:12:00.000-07:00

So, come Monday, who di you think you'll vote for?

personally I'm sick of Paul Martin. I don't trust him and I think he's just desperate.
The Liberal agenda looks good on paper but rarely reeps any benefits.
As for Harper and the conservatives...that's the death of Canada right there

So, for better or for worse, I'm voting NDP.
It may be a vote lost...but I won't support any of the others.

I think that every year creates more people like me; those who are disgusted by both major parties and decide to vote for the underdog.
I predict that within 50 years the NDP will be rotating between the opposition and elected parties

Long term goals

2006-01-19T07:46:00.000-07:00

my long term goal is to one day spit at somebody's feet in disgust

this is a crude representation of the event:

LEAVE ME ALONE!!

2006-01-16T18:00:00.000-07:00

LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
STOP TOUCHING ME YOU FAT FILTHY CAPITALIST BASTARDS!!!!

I can't help it if it's generalizing...but lately, I just hate all old white men in suits carrying breifcases.
even more than them...the young ones!!! with their fucking slicked back hair and shades and smirk that says "I snorted coke out of the small of a hookers back last night"

Let them all bathe in their stolen money
Let them eat their cake
Hopefully someday they'll choke on it
Or, I'll put a bone in there myself.
THE BONE OF PROLETARIAT UNREST!!

that may be construed as dirty...A FIGURATIVE BONE!!!

I don't know if I'm more mad at the parasitic social heirarchy imposed upon us, or my foolishness in falling for EVERY LAST ONE of their traps!

I'm trapped inside, guys

I'm trapped inside

roast chicken chips fiasco

2006-01-10T08:29:00.000-07:00

So I caved and bought a bag of roast chicken chips last night

man can't live on nutritional food alone, afterall
Not that I think chunky soup is terribly nutritional

but anyway, I opened the bag and started eating.
that sweet sweet flavor went right to my head. It's like a good wine, I swear.
all those little particals of real roast chicken.
did you know they actually roast a whole chicken than shave it with a cheese grater over an open bag of chips? It's true.

but anyway, I was minding my own business when I see something in there that isn't a potato chip. You know what it was? You'll never guess.
No...not a human finger...but good guess, guys....good guess.
It was one of those tin foil sheets that comes in cigarette packages. The one where the tin foil can be seperated from the thin white sheet.
There was a crumpled up one of those in my bag of roast chicken chips.

I can't make this shit up...it's true.

But no sense in letting all that real roast chicken go to waste

top 20 of 2005

2006-01-08T20:15:00.000-07:00

here we go...true sign of a man with too much time on his hands.
I've already done a top 10...but that was two months ago. it was premature and not fully thought out.

lets do this

old school

this is objective and totally factual
(I've not included EP's)

20. Vitalic - OK Cowboy
19. Caribou - The Milk Of Human Kindness
18. Fembots - The City
17. Boards of Canada - The Campfire Headphase
16. Ryan Adams - Jacksonville City Nights
15. Andrew Bird - and the mysterious production of eggs
14. Antony and the Johnsons - I am a Bird Now
13. Hold Steady - Seperation Sunday
12. M83 - Before the Dawn Heals Us
11. The Silver Jews - Tanglewood Numbers
10. Josh Rouse- Nashville
9. Jamie Lidell - Multiply
8. John Vanderslice - Pixel Revolt
7. Lucksmiths - Warmer Corners
6. Clientele - Strange Geometry
5. Constantines - Tournament of Hearts
5. M. Ward - Transistor Radio
4. Decemberists - Picaresque
3. Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning
2. My Morning Jacket - Z
1. Wolf Parade - Apologies to the Queen Mary

Other albums I enjoyed and/or need to listen to more beofre I include them in a list(including EP's)

Beck - Guero
Laura Cantrell - Hummed By the Flowered Vine
Iron and Wine/Calexico - In The Reins (EP)
Iron and Wine - Woman King(EP)
Jens Lekman - Oh You're So Silent Jens
Grandaddy - Excerpts from the Diary of Toddzilla
Wooden Wand and the Vanishing Voice - Harem of the Sundrum & the Witness Figg
Sleater-Kinney - The Woods
Fruit Bats - Spelled in Bones
Bonnie "prince" Billy/Matthew Sweeney - Superwolf
Sufjan Stevens - Illinois

Celebrity of the day

2006-01-08T19:22:00.000-07:00

I can think of not one bad thing to say about him

PS

2006-01-07T21:02:00.000-07:00

PS: mike, I drank that peach shit in the fridge

sorry, dude
I'll buy whoever bought that peach shit some more peach shit whenever they want it

I hate titles

2006-01-07T20:58:00.000-07:00

It's amusing what you see from your balcony on a saturday night

there was this guy
he was running
I don't know why

Then on the other side of the street, going the opposite way, were two guys walking
I guess the running man got self-conscious and slowed down to a walk
as if to say, "I'm cool, nothing to see here"
I thought to myself, "when those guys get pass by he'll start running again"

SURE ENOUGH, he did!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

LOL!!

LMAOROTF!!!

*eugh*

New Years...over

2006-01-01T19:51:00.000-07:00

See-ya 2005! And good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.
so now that he's gone I can finally say this. he sucked!
Man, that year really had some issues.
I mean, REALLY!
worst year EVER

But I've got a feeling about this new year...this... "2006"
This is the "do or die" year
the "make or break" year
It's "go big or go home"
"grow balls or die alone"

It's a pivotal year; I can feel it.
2005 set it up; brought things to such a point of desperation and depravity that 2006 can either be the year I figure out how to get out of this mess, or the first year I live on the streets; there are no other options.

365 days into the future, I'll be back here (in some form)
what will I say.
will it be the same it's been every year.
You say, "I'll make things work this year", but you never do.

I mean, we say this kind of shit every year, don't we?
maybe we have to stop thinking of a year as a period of time during which we can get a lot done.
years fly by!
they're short.
perhaps NOT a lot can happen in a year.
perhaps life is generally static.
change and improvements are exceptions to the rule.

christmas...done

2005-12-27T17:26:00.000-07:00

thank the lord for bestowing 'travelling mercies' upon me and getting me the hell out of hell

family is great and all...but, really, is anything worth 4 days in Fort Mac?

I don't know...I just don't know

gettin' this out of the way

2005-12-17T22:15:00.000-07:00

I've had this song finished for quite some time, but I never recorded it...it's almost 7 minutes.
I did a rush job on it cos I wanna get started on re-recording some of the other ones and take a break from writing.

I Made a Deal With Jesus Christ

I made a deal with Jesus Christ
I said, "I want my life back"
he said, "you name the price"
As I was leaving he broke down and cried
He said, "I always loved you, but you never tried"

They say those hands weave a mystery
and in the end it will be clear to see
They're plucking answers from the answer tree
While their children sweat with a fistful of seeds

Trading hope for insecurities
Praying daily for some mercy
Can't they see the sky is torn apart?
Can't they tell the ocean is drying up?

I love the way the bows are bending
I love the music in the air
I'll take this thought with me forever
Sometimes I wish you were still here

Something's missing from the big picture
But excuses never seemed so sweet
Put down your guns, I want a minute of your time
Then you can finish with your genocide

What do you dream of when you sleep?
What voices come to you at night?
You and me, we are alike
Long forgotten while we fight

I made a deal with Jesus Christ
I said, "I want my life back"
he said, "you name the price"
As I was leaving he broke down in tears
I said, "I will remember you like the passing of the years"

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Got Elk?

2005-12-12T06:57:00.000-07:00

I have the cute title...I have the boyish charm.

but, do I have the goods?

I don't know

anyway.
Got back from Jasper yesterday where I was for the company christmas party.
it was fun, and frustrating on some levels.
but mostly fun.

One little story I'll share with you concerns me and a herd of nefarious elk. (I just wanted to say 'nefarious'. That word sure does it for me. Like Emporium. sexy words)
anyway, I'm walking back to my cabin on saturday night after all the "hoop-la" and festivities.
Typically, I get lost and wander around for 2 hours. During this time I come upon said elk.

So I decide to stand with them for a while (1/2 hour) and let nature calm my frustrated bones.
After some time passed I thought I'd try and get closer.
There were about 15 of them and most were female.
So I guess the big ol' stag didn't take too kindly to me approaching and he come towards me.
it's at this point that I think it might be better to back up and get the hell out of dodge.

I don't want to be the guy in one of those newspaper stories that majik sznack posts on his blog. You know...the guy that dies from something stupid, and people who read it laugh at him.

I don't want people to laugh at my death, is what I'm trying to say.

parking 101

2005-12-03T14:43:00.000-07:00

this must be the worst parking job I've ever seen.
he/she just drove in face first and got out.

I'm gonna go down there and stand by that car until the guilty party comes and then here's what I'm gonna do
I'm gonna punch them right on the top of the head and then I'm gonna call them names
And when they're crying from emotional and physical pain I'm going to tell them that nobody loves them

newness

2005-12-03T12:47:00.000-07:00

I bought a new guitar
I thought of names...like Winnifred
normal-y-ish names
But I think I'll go with a generic name like CRUSHER

actually...maybe something like "the duke" or "major"
maybe "Duke Crusher"
maybe not crusher though.

now that I think about it. Perhaps I should name it after a historical figure.
maybe Karl Marx
if I went with a female....I dunno...Anne Boleyn

I won't bite!!

2005-11-28T21:17:00.000-07:00

I swear I don't bite!
Maybe I do, though...I don't know
I could eat you alive for all I know.
I don't think I'd do that.
but who knows?
But, I'm telling you with 90% certainty that I won't bite you 8 times out of ten with a standard deviation of 1.2

I know what you're all saying,
"what the h-e-double hockey sticks are you talking about, major major?"

and I'l lleave you with these two words:
indentured servants

it's that time again!

2005-11-24T22:08:00.000-07:00

that's right. kids
that time when major major cuts himself and bleeds all over his blog

Hymn#24

I wanna be the street you're walking on
I wanna be the highway when you're gone
because this blood is boiling, like there's something wrong

I wanna be the sky you stare into
I wanna be the train you listen to
because these hands are shaking, and that's nothing new

Breath is lost somewhere in the middle
Where poets weep
and fools drink themselves to sleep

I wanna be the song you're dancing with
I wanna be the suitcase that you lift
because these eyes are closing on their last shift

I wanna be the raindrops on your face
I wanna be the door when you leave this place
because I am tired and cannot keep up this chase

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/view/01/default.cfm?bandID=190327&content=music

Generic Post

2005-11-20T10:45:00.000-07:00

just gonna list out some of my favorite albums from this year. This will be the first rough installment (done out of boredom). STAY TUNED FOR A COMPLETELY OVER-WROUGHT AND METICULOUSLY PREPARED TOP 20!!

10. Fembots - The City
It continues to grow on me. A pretty dark brand of alt-country.
Something about how he sings "So long this life is" will make you shiver.
Favorite tracks: So Long, Up From the Ditches, My Life in the Funeral Service

9. Hold Steady - Seperation Sunday
Would it be bad to say that these songs could fit into the soundtrack for That 70's Show.
That's the only way I can describe it. It's really great rock and roll, guys.
Favorite tracks: Cattle and the Creeping Things, Your Little Hoodrat Friend

8. Lucksmiths - Warmer Corners
stubborn optimism, cheerful pessimism, poppy confident arrangements...they live up to their names sake.
Fav tracks: Great Lengths, Sunlight in a Jar, If You Lived Here, You'd Be Home Now

7. Andrew Bird - Andrew Bird and the Mysterious Eggs of Production
He'll tell you that you are just what happens when two substances collide...but he'll wink at you when he says it.
Fav songs: Nervous Tic of Motion Of the Head to the Left, Savoy

6. Constantines - Tournament of Hearts
How many rock bands do you know that can hold one chord for a whole song and somehow wrestle a verse and chorus out of it? This is a clever album. I think in ten years The Constantines will be as much Canadiana as Blue Rodeo

5. The Decemberists - Picaresque
Ah, a delicious treat for you linguists, I'm sure. Meloy churns out 5 dollar words like my mom churns out tea-buns. To a backdrop of Early-modern charicatures and chamber pop arrangements.
Favorite tracks: We Both Go Down Together, The Engine Driver

4. M. Ward - Transistor Radio
The "warmest" album of this year, without a doubt. He could have released this in 1940 and nobody would be phased.
Fav tracks: One Life Away, Sweethearts on Parade, Paul's Song, Radio Campaign

3. Bright Eyes - I'm Wide Awake, It's Morning
Conor is one of those artists that I hope to follow for another 10 years at least. The improvements that he makes with each album is nothing to ignore. Every line is poignant and clever. "We must talk in every telephone, get eaten off the web. We must rip out all the epilogues in the books that we have read. and in the face of every criminal strapped firmly to a chair; we must stare, we must stare, we must stare"
listen to: At the Bottom of Everything, Landlocked Blues, Road to joy

2. Wolf Parade - Apologies to the Queen Mary
They got tangled up in the cogs of the 'hype machine' long before the record was even released. Adn whereas bands like Clap Your Hands, Say Yeah seem to have gotten lost in it, the Wolf Parade sound like they could stick around. Queen Mary is cold and empty and desperate. So...if that's your thing, pick it up.
Standouts:
You are a Runner, and I am my Fathers Son
Modern World
Same Ghost Every Night
I'll Believe in Anything
This Hearts on Fire

1. My Morning Jacket - Z
This came out of nowhere for me. I was expecting them to release a good album, but nothing like this. Z feels big and important; cocky and smart. From the very first song to the last.
Check out: Wordless Chorus, Off the Record, Into the Woods, Knot Comes Loose, Dondante

Like Music From an Unexpected Place

2005-11-13T10:09:00.000-07:00

this 2 minute ditty just kinda fell into my lap yesterday.
I swear, I can still write songs over 5 minutes...you'll see...oh, you'll see
-------------------------------------

See those eyes,
they sparkle like a well at nighttime
when the moon is rising full and bright
Hear that laugh
like water rushing through a shallow bed
like music from an unexpected place

Beauty is what life's about
but too often it just feels like
window shopping when you're down and out

You can say I must look up,
you can say we're all in touch
You can be the friend who just means well
yeah, It's true I'm usually wrong
but maybe just this once
I could be right

I love wishing on those eyes,
and I love swimming in that laugh,
it's just the best way I can think to pass the time

It's beautiful to talk to you,
but it's beautiful to just lay low
and listen to the day pass you by
and it's beautiful to watch you move,
even if I'm far removed
like music from an unexpected place

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It's time for Major Major's Picture of the Day, guys!

2005-11-12T07:13:00.000-07:00

christmas time is coming, guys

2005-11-09T07:56:00.000-07:00

can't you feel it in the air?
or, failing that, surely you see it in the windows?

it's here, guys
go broke or gain weight!

it's 20 pounds or bust!

It's all about the family though...big extended families
spawrling down the table until you can barely make out the defining characteristics of your first cousin.
"Boy, this is some good turkey!"
"we're so blessed!"
"break out the guitar and piano, guys, it's time from some choruses!"

ah...christmas...wonderful, awkward, overwrought, joyful and depressing

resolutions

2005-11-05T11:41:00.000-07:00

god, I have so many new years resolutions to make
I might as well start early, so I can get the failing over with

ever want to quit something only to find you're powerless to do so?
ever really want to start something only to find you can't?

all the pep talks don't matter
a hundred of them is the same as one
it doesn't matter, so why do I keep getting them?

Update

2005-10-31T18:57:00.000-07:00

I won something on Saturday night.
I won 3rd place for best dressed at the Blues on Whyte

I think it was more of a "you deserve something cos you had the gall to wear that"

I was just in regular clothes, but I had mouse ears and a tail coming out my ass and whiskers drawn on my face
the dot on my nose got rubbed off fairly quickly

And if you are waiting for me to wax poetic, forget it.

More sunday chronicles

2005-10-23T12:55:00.000-06:00

another song.
short one...seems like they get shorter and shorter
maybe a patience thing

and why always on sunday?
maybe that's when I'm inspired most, thinking of my ridiculous behaviour over the course of the weekend. Damnit, what the bloody HELL was I up to last night?

------------------------

You Don't Have to Shine

Please stay by my side, I think I may be lost
I need your smile right now, it's all that I have here

I don't have a line, and you don't have to shine

You're eyes, they stare at me
I wonder what they see
But I'll try to forget
If you don't turn your head

I don't have a line, and you don't have to shine

Please stay here with me, I think I may be lost
and I need your voice right now, to make me feel at home

I don't have a line, and you don't have to shine

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=190327&content=music

Mother Nature dropped the ball

2005-10-22T14:34:00.000-06:00

I got to thinking today.
there are lots of interesting creatures on planet earth.

but, strangely, there's a gap where poisonous bears should be.

There really needs to be a bear that secretes a poison from his teeth and fangs so potent it could kill a horse

newshit#11

2005-10-16T19:01:00.000-06:00

Okay...I didn't think i would complete the trilogy of unfinished songs today...but I started writing lyrics and it came pretty easy
this is what happens when you're inside for most of a weekend, folks

I did go to get groceries today though...if pizza, bread, and sandwich meats can be cponsidered groceries
http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=190327&content=music
--------

I'm a Sundial

I'm a sundial sitting on this floor
My shadow circles, begging me for more
Is this what time has become?

0000000000000000000000000000000000000h

Outside whispers, a calling on the breeze
But inside shows me more tricks up his sleeve
Six more hours of this

ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh

A gentles reminder
as vision starts to blur
Fighting sleep now
My thoughts begin to slur

I'm a sundial

----------

newshit#10

2005-10-16T12:29:00.000-06:00

had a little fun with this one
I guess the subject material is similar to the last song
seems to be the theme lately

------------------
http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=190327&content=music

Vines

How do you walk away from what you have become?
These chains have grown on me like vines
How do you change the morning tide?
Everybody draws me lines

It's easy when you're right
And it's easy to lose sight
When darkness falls it's time to find a light

Don't fall asleep or you'll drift too far
These waves have beat on me for years
How do you start on a new page?
All these old ones feed my fears

and I will burn them all
and as the ashes fall
I will turn my back
and walk away from it all

new shit#9

2005-10-16T09:39:00.000-06:00

I've had 3 half finished songs sitting around for weeks.
it's difficult when you have more than one cos it's hard to focus.
keep getting distracted by the other ones.

I'm thinking I definitely ripped this melody off. At least the chorus one.
I'd still label this one as quite unfinished.

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=190327&content=music

the mp3's don't seem to work anymore, so stream it
or whatever...if you want to hear it

----------------

Been turning rocks
Been beating trails
Building home with coffin nails
Chasing ghosts
Through waking hours
With empty hands, in empty towers

I never asked for much
Now all I hear is

"You can see, but you can't touch
You're still young, there is no rush
But remember, you could die before you wake
So never morn the lack
and never turn your back
or you'll get lost"

So, now I'm lost
But I feel alive
For the first time
Since I took that dive
When you let go
and you're all alone
You will look down
to see you have flown

You must never ask for much

No one is young, no one is old
It's never too late to turn around
It's never too soon to leave town

...

2005-10-13T06:58:00.000-06:00

this is just because I haven't posted here in quite some time.

how are things?

I'm sick but I can't take a day off
I'm tired but I can't sleep
"my mind is full of radio cures"*
I can't stop thinking...everyday...24 hours a day
man, I would kill to be able to stop thinking

I saw the Cons last night
it was great

bye

*Jeff Tweedy

awwwwww?!?!?!?!?!

LOL!!!!

newshit#8

2005-09-25T13:51:00.000-06:00

Just experimentation
doubt I'll ever play it live or whatever

http://www.soundclick.com/pro/default.cfm?BandID=190327&content=music

Woke Up

Woke up
Sat up
Put my clothes on
Got in my car
and drove
Missed the turnoff
the one that leads me to work
Drove to the airport
Got a passport
went to Europe
And started over

Years passed
The romance died
I realized
This is the same thing that I left

So I wake up
and sit up
Put my clothes on
Get in my car
and drive
and I take that turnoff

newshit#7

2005-09-18T15:52:00.000-06:00

big rush job on this one. I find I'm getting less and less patience to spend a lot of time recording. Which is probably good for a change, just to have vocals and guitar.
A more optimistic way of handling my problem with melloncholy

I Can Deal

Rushing blood, a river in my veins
Leaves me dizzy
I'm thinking, 'I can deal'

Foolish words made a man out of me
Lost amongst such beautiful smiles
I thought, 'I can deal'

Saddness rests on an autumn leaf
The wind is coming to rescue me
I think I can deal

Give me warmth and I just might stay
Give me ice and I'll find a way
Cos there's always a way
There must be a way

Have mercy, I'm no catch
But for an hour I felt alright
Thinking I can deal

Wishful thinking will always bring you down
But the high is worth the low
If you can deal

When it ends and it's all said and done
and I'm back in my room with a guitar and a gun
I'll write another song
Until it all comes back

http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2881291&ref=2

filler

2005-09-18T11:30:00.000-06:00

I just want to get that last post off the top. I'm getting sick of seeing it.

so, how am I doing?

I'm all right (alright)

I've been worse
HOW ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!

HUH?

Why does this have to all about me?

~ filler

wait for it...wait for it....

2005-09-11T19:12:00.000-06:00

Let's see this through

there could be something new in this

Not as happy as previous times
not as giddy

that means I've learned
self defense
shells
that's good

That's something

complacent
In a good way

content, perhaps

yeah, if this is it, I can deal with it
not so bad

like the sea swallowing the moon whole
There's still a white light on the surface

I'm just gonna wait for it

reflect on all I've just said
wow...I'm emo.
I can embrace that. It's better than embracing something I'm not

picture myself.
dyed hair ( jet black)
little side bag
flare
coffee

hahaha...that's good
How do they go through life so fake
stumbling around with a characiture wrapped around them

It's hiding.
but I guess we all do it to an extent

BLAAAAAAAAAH

I wanna sleep underneath the weeping willow

hahaha
I like this

New Shit#6

2005-09-06T23:15:00.000-06:00

http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2839916&ref=2

Mystic and Me*

You told me where I could get it
and how to get there
You said I am the dirt and I am the square
of a town full of people who worship the ground
and I'll wish I was gone, and I'll wish I was gone
When it all comes around, when it all comes around

It's truth if I live it
But it's lies if I throw it away

You count me among all the stars in the sky
you say there's no truth, except when you lie
how can you speak like it all comes to shit
when there's a light in your eye
like the one I left on in my house last night

It's lies if you just throw it all away

But this is your life, you say
this is the life
And it's all coming down on us
it's all coming down

well I wish I could have faith in nothing at all
or I wish I could have faith in God up above

I feel like I'm falling
and I feel like I'm rising

* not sure of this title. But I like that it's less mellodramatic and most of my other song-titles

newshit#5

2005-09-06T07:21:00.000-06:00

http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2836824&ref=2

been kicking around for a while.
as much a love song as I have.
Don't like the lyrics so much

A Memory

On the city streets we held a tune
Mingled laughter with the passing cars
Under wishing stars I thanked each and every one
For the beauty beside me arm in arm

We were a happy pair
We had two lives to share
We had eternity
The time you spent with me

Under golden skies you smiled for me
Forever changed the way that I would see
Broke the ice away and made me sing
For the beauty beside me arm in arm

new shit#4

2005-09-05T11:42:00.000-06:00

http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2833160&ref=2

When I Laugh Into a Joke

Somebody think's It's funny
When I laugh into a joke
Fallen angels pray for me
Then fallen angels choke

The moon is rising too fast
And the sun is much too slow
If morning is the steeple
Then evening's in the know

The windows are boarded over
and I can't see a thing
but the sign still says open
like the box you're always in

Love is in the air
But all I smell is smoke
You smile like a prostitute
When I laugh into a joke

Airplanes are my demons
and there's nothing they don't get
If death is the purpose
Then I'm not dead yet

Keep me under
There's a tear in my eye
What good is the morning
If you don't know how to die?

"a case of malaise floating around"

2005-09-05T09:15:00.000-06:00

A friend said this on another BLOG and it's true.

But it's not limited to our circle of friends. The whole city feels different.

It's sunny on this Labour Day but I don't think anyone is very happy.

I saw a girl crying in the car in front of me earlier.

I think it's something in the water. But I've had Malaise since I graduated from Elementary School, so maybe it's not in the water.
Now I think I've graduated from Malaise, because I'm passionate about my feelings once more. I think I'm almost in a place where I will fight with anyone to defend the sanctity of sadness
Don't get me wrong...I don't think it's permenant.
Maybe one life-altering event will break it all away
clean out the grime

Maybe all I need is to walk more
maybe all I need is to make more money
eat more eggs
rediscover the Lord
drink less (more?)
Get rid of the internet
Play more music
give up music
grow some balls
Go eunuch

come on, friends. Lets do something about it.

new shit#3

2005-09-04T18:38:00.000-06:00

I drove home this morning and told myself to write a new song now or give up guitar forever. It's ultimatum season.
Anyway, that's where this little guy came from. I wrote the music, lyrics, and recorded it all in a couple hours. So all I'm saying is not to expect too much "tightness"-wise

Puzzle Pieces Fall

You followed them into another trap
And now there's no escape
That's what happens when you leave your car at home
Because you're afraid to be alone

Puzzle pieces fall
But you're drunk against the wall
And you lost another night
But you say it felt so ight

Here's comes the infantry to say there are no walls
and you are free to leave
Don't you see that is the problem with the infantry,
they take their walls with them

mp3 - http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2830565&ref=2

Perpetual night

2005-08-28T22:07:00.000-06:00

blah blah blah

now here I am with Rickards, alone on a Sunday night.

I don't know why I chose Rickards.

blah blah blah

It's 10:10pm as I write this.
In just 9 hours I will awake into a new week.

all things made new, right?

In 9 hours I will get up, curse the alarm clock and the faceless man that started it all, and proceed to get ready to go to work.

What do I do?
People have asked me before.
I just say shipper
I "ship things"

Clients call me and order bottles to take samples in. Then they send the bottles back to us for ANALYSIS
My heart breaks in half everytime the phone rings

blah blah blah.

Anyway. This is boring.

I will leave you with this:

Be careful what you say, Leonard is watching

2005-08-28T22:01:00.000-06:00

I just got two words for you

2005-08-20T18:07:00.000-06:00

I really don't know what to post anymore. What am I gonna do? tell you about my "day"?

pffft.

that sucks.

my days are an asshole. Like that best friend you grew up with and got tired of but you still got to invite him over to hang out because...well...you grew up together, damnit.

That doesn't work.
sorry

me and allegory haven't been getting along lately. Every since I told him he's like that stray cat that DOES NOT leave you alone

anyway.

where was I?

two words, right?
I got your two words right here

That bell thing in my throat is an asshole

2005-08-14T21:23:00.000-06:00

so yeah, I wake up this morning and this...thins....THING.,..this hideous bell shaped thing in my throat is acting oddly.

maybe swollen or something. I can feel it sometimes with my tongue.

gross, eh?

I could probably eat it if I wanted too...!! HAHA LOL!! ROTFLMAO!!

that's so gross.
I'm sorry
That's gross

I think I'll just ride this one out. Always seems to work

It's time again for a weekly installment of, "Oh my God! That's Horrible!!!"

2005-08-10T20:41:00.000-06:00

Wow, America, you really came up with the worse possible scenario one could ever imagine. Your song really drew me in cos I was terrified of the impact of such a tramatic experience!

Imagine, if you will, riding along the desert like you would normally do. A nice Sunday afternoon trot through the sweltering desert.
Then you realize...

"I FORGOT TO NAME MY HORSE!! Shit! Here I am, like a chump, riding on a horse with no name!!! I'm so full of shame, my family will disown me"

Never Talk To People You Don't Need to Talk With (Part II of the Inspirational "I Don't Want to Talk To You" series)

2005-08-10T20:03:00.000-06:00

When I go on Lunch break outside, sometimes there will be a person I've never interacted with. Everything is fine...none of us feel the need to strike up a conversation. We're just two workers, cramming down lunch and what have you, before we head back in to drown our souls in an ocean of expectations and resented responsibility.
But then one day you decide to talk to this individual. Everything goes fine; you hit off a great little conversation.
DON'T YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU HAVE DONE?!?!

you have created the perverbial nesting grounds for awkward situations.

Now the next time you are around this person and there's nothing to talk about, you'll both be feeling awkward. "ah, gee, I was chatting up this person yesterday, feels kinda like I should at least say hello"

Way to go, guys,
you made the nesting ground.
nice little nesting ground. What is nesting in this nests? awkward sitautions, that's what.

little nesting grounds

I can't toss a word salad

2005-08-04T20:25:00.000-06:00

I've been sitting here thinking for too damn long.

I'll type one title, look at it, and decide I can't run with this

I can't ROLL with this
so I erase it and start thinking again.
Should I talk about the dream I had where I was dating a beautiful supermodel* and we both rented a hotel room to...play risk...?
Maybe about my failures as an adult male.
Maybe get into some psychotherapy.

Everybody should try walking down whyte ave in nothing but a sweatshirt; it's quite liberating

Everybody should say "I'd tap that" at least once a day

anyway I digress

*

:sexywink:

New Shit#2

2005-08-01T14:36:00.000-06:00

Pretty simple, I guess
Actually wrote it 3 or 4 years ago.

I guess I'll call it Hang On To This
or something

stream --> http://www.soundclick.com/util/streamM3U.m3u?ID=2703780&q=Hi

Mp3 --> http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2703780

The sky is a baby blue
I'm on my feet thinking of you
and I'm happy today
and I don't want to let it go

oh, the grass is a cartoon green
the prettiest thing I've ever seen
and I'm happy today
and I don't want to let it go

I've got to hang onto this
I've got to hang onto this
Because I know just what will happen if I let go
this time

The wind is in my face
full of mercy, full of grace
and I'm happy today
and I don't want to let it go

Oh, the river sings a song
It's taking away all the wrong
and I notice all this time
I've been smiling

Major Major's 'Advertures With Common Folk'

2005-07-24T16:29:00.000-06:00

So just now I was walking down 81st avenue and this guy calls out to me from his door. He asked me a question...and this is indeed one for pondering.

"It's beef you cook with rat poison, right?"

I thought he was joking, but he wasn't.

What can you say?

"yeah..it's beef"

"yeah, cos I don't think it's chicken," he says

I want to fight you

2005-07-23T10:07:00.000-06:00

I have never known the joy of human cartilage cracking under my fist.
someone elses blood staining my shirt.

I have never known the satisfaction of uninhibited retaliation

DAMN IT ALL I WANT TO FIGHT YOU IN THE FACE!

next person who looks at me the wrong way is getting a KNUCKLE SANDWICH.
I mean....if you even look at me at all...you will receive a jawbreaker...and not the candy kind...and you won't have to sign for it. I'll just haul off and let the fists of judgement rain down on the top of your head.

That's my move.
most people go for the face...
but I will PUMMEL you right on the top of the head, repeatedly

And then I will take a walk by myself, down to the river.
And I'll get to thinking.
I'M A MONSTER!!!
WHAT HAVE I BECOME!!!!???!!

I'll jump in the river and swim.
I won't know where I'm going...to the sea, eventually.
I just know I have escape...........*hushedwhisper*............from myself

new shit

2005-07-18T19:50:00.000-06:00

So I finally wrote a new song.
it's not...so...happy

but I swear, this will be the last song I write where I feel sorry for myself. At least for a while...YOU CAN'T EXPECT A MAN TO CHANGE OVER NIGHT!
but the next two sets of lyrics I'm working with have nothing to do with me, really

stream - http://www.soundclick.com/util/streamM3U.m3u?ID=2659587&q=Hi
Mp3 - http://www.soundclick.com/util/DownloadSong.cfm?ID=2659587

Take Me Home

Take me home I was not prepared
and this world is going to eat me alive
Take me back to a time that was eternal
Where I could sleep and not worry about what's coming next
Who are they fooling when they say you need a plan
a plan is just something that never works out right

Turn me over
Take me in
Heaven's fallen
Never win

Every dream must end
and then morning begins

What do people talk about?

2005-07-12T19:16:00.000-06:00

So, I'm going to Calgary tomorrow on a sort of business meeting - though that makes it sounds more important than it really is.
I'm gonna be driving down there with a gal from work.
Don't go grinning you assholes...she's taken. But's she's very pretty, tis true.
anyway, I would have a hard enough time talking to a good friend in a car for 3 hours, let alone someone I don't really know that well...let alone someone I don't know who is female.
It's probably going to be 100% pure awkwardness.
Music I guess.

I always see people at work, talking to each other. Some guy will just walk up to another guy and they'll start talking and laughing.
When I'm walking down the street, so many people are talking to each other. Lost in conversation.
I watch people on the phone, talking for more than 10 minutes.

WHAT ARE ALL THESE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT?!?!

"uhhh...how's life?"
that kind of stuff?

I SUUUUUUUUUUCK at talking.
I think that whenever I have a girlfriend, not only will the first date be awkward...but our WHOLE lives together.
we'll be 75 and sitting around the dinner table not knowing what to say; I'll be looking at my food and playing with it, searching every cavern of my brain for something to talk about.

What can I talk about? the Weather? No, I did that 10 minutes ago. DAMNIT! I ALWAYS use up the weather card to early!!

Showcase time

2005-07-10T21:35:00.000-06:00

So yeah, I'm a little bored and not feeling like coming up with anything of my own, so I'll just leave you with two artists who have invaded my mental space as of late.

M. Ward
I like in one review I read how they described his voice as "beautifully flawed"...though not flawed in the Rob Thomas sort of way. I wish I could find the mp3 for One Life Away off his new album Transistor Radio...that song could have been a big hit in 1945. It's the kind of music I wish I had a record player for...or even a grammaphone! [sic?] So do what you have to do to get One Life Away....I'm not saying use illegal means..I'm just saying. In the meantime, here are some other mp3's

Radio Campaign (from new album) - http://mergerecords.com/m3u.php?media_id=208&
more mp3's - http://mergerecords.com/band.php?media=true&band_id=8

A blurb:
Even to the fully initiated, M. Ward is somewhat of a mysterious enigma, a half-named troubadour with an otherworldly voice and an old time sensibility. Equally adept dancing across genres such as folk, blues, jazz and rock, Ward is a stunning performer. His latest album, “Transistor Radio”, was released by Merge records on February 22nd.
- south by southwest festival showcase

Andrew Bird

It's hard to really classify him. One might be tempted to oversimplify...fact is, sometimes he sounds melodic in the radiohead sort of way, then the next moment he might be throwing out a Rufus Wainwright vibe, and then out with the old timey stuff. And apparently his older albums are retro-swing!
For posterity's sake I will give you an mp3 which will flow nicely from Ward's stuff. This song is great, though it's really all about the beautiful and haunting whistling
http://ekonomiskmgmt.com/audio/andrew_bird/Nervous_Tic.mp3

Blurb
The result is an utterly mesmerizing and magnetic album, almost unfair in how incredibly ambitious and impressively pulled off the whole thing is. Of course, the release of Mysterious Production of Eggs brings to mind the unfair question, "What could possibly come next?" before the album has had the chance to even completely sink into its own place in Andrew Bird's baffling catalog.
-all music

Taking art to the next level

2005-07-06T22:06:00.000-06:00

The Calm After the Storm

2005-07-04T22:18:00.000-06:00

So, anyway, I wanted to go down to the high-level bridge tonight when it got dark cos I love it there...i guess it's the river.
I just like being beside a river. it's one of the most calming and reassuring things I can think of.

But it doesn't get dark until 11:00pm and that's just too late.
Damn daylight - HOGGING all the hours. There's only 24 you know? If Kiefer Sutherland taught me anything it's that.

And then I'm also afraid some under-privledged person would mug me

LOL!
ROTFLMAO!!!!!

Years of Internalized Frustration Released on a Blog

2005-07-04T22:11:00.000-06:00

AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!

BRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

!!

MAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH SHIT SHIT SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

PUNCHING THINGS!!!!!!!
HITTING TV SCREENS WITH BASEBALL BATS!!!
I'M IN A ROOM WITH A THOUSAND SCREENS AND I'M BASHING THEM ALL WITH BASEBALL BATS!!!!!

DFKSLDJGDLHGLSJFHLG!!!

Morning Post!!

2005-06-28T07:13:00.000-06:00

My wits are not about me!!

It's 7:13am!!

What HI-JINKS will ensue???

I got nothing.

I can tell you that I dreamt A LOT of very very strange things. Most of it was apopolyptic, but there was a segment where I go to Tim Hortons, eat something, then take a shower IN TIM HORTONS before paying.

anyway, it kinda takes something away from a day when you know exactly everything that will happen from beginning to end.

7:3oam - Stalling getting ready for work
8:00 - Getting ready
8:15 -Picking out cd's to bring to work
8:30 - going to work
9:00 - 6:00pm - working (this time period includes breaks and lunch)
6:10 - drop into store to get SUB-LIME Froster
6:30 - Eat
7:00 - Be lazy, play games, maybe shower
7:30 - If you're still reading this you are so so very pathetic
8:00 - Play guitar
8:30 - waiting to leave for the Druid
8:45 - Still waiting; you suck so much
9:00 -Life on hold until I leave for Druid
9:30 - leaving for druid to meet my lame friends
9:45 - WHENEVER I WANT TO LEAVEpm - Hanging at the druid.

Major Major's Definitive Elliott Smith List

2005-06-25T11:36:00.000-06:00

Until I get my BRAIN JUICES flowing again I'm gonna opt for something tried and true. I WILL DO A LIST!!!

Best albums (in order from best to the least best):

1. Self-Titled
2. Either/Or
3. XO
4. From a Basement on The Hill
5. Roman Candle
6. Figure 8

Wanna get into Elliott? any of these might make a good starting point:

Waltz #2
Between The Bars
Miss Misery
Junk Bond Trader
King's Crossing
Clementine
Needle in the Hay
No Name #3

Stay tuned next week for 'Major Major's Definitive Guide to Healthy Living'

Merl goes to the future and returns to find a shrine

2005-06-22T19:47:00.000-06:00

"I have gathered you all here this evening for an important announcement", explains Merl, as his friends and family look on with puzzled expressions, "I am leaving tonight, and I will not return."
No he isn't being dramatic.
and, no, he isn't insane.
Our friend Merl was approached earlier with a choice. He could either stay here on Earth and live out the rest of his days until he dies an old man
OR
he could travel the universe; every last inch of it...every last planet.
Of course, the catch is he could never see the people he loved again. Travelling the universe requires more than octane. You have to move at the speed of light.
Therefore, a year to our friend Merl would be many lifetimes for his friends.
Anyway, I think Merl had something more to say.

"I know you are all thinking that I've finally lost my last screw, but I kid you not. After this night you will never see me again. I will return...eventually...but you will all be many years dead. I'm not expecting you to believe me now. All I ask is this:
When ten years have passed and no sight of me or my body have been seen, do this for me: go to the place where I spent so much time as a child; my family's log cabin by Kiln's Cove. Leave for me there, buried but clearly marked, whatever messages you want me to read when I return many years in the future. Leave me something to remember you by."

And so he left and journeyed to the ends of the universe. So many things he saw that he began to think of our own galaxy as a speck of dust, and our own sun as a small star. But regrets he harboured...they boiled inside of him. Perhaps he had all he needed back home. Perhaps the company of friends actually does outweigh the exploration of things unknown.

Meanwhile his fame grew back on Earth. He became a myth. A legend. His log cabin became the destination of pilgramages, and eventually, the biggest time capsul/historical site in the world. People travelled from all over to leave messages for Merl, in hopes they would someday be read.

What Merl found when he returned was beyond words.
A 10 story 'museum' of sorts; some floors devoted to messages and notes from pilgrams, some devoted to Merl himself - every detail of his life.

But all he could do when faced with this spectacle was fall to his knees and weep tears of regret.
Was this worth it?

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

2005-06-17T22:46:00.000-06:00

I'm a nice guy
sometimes I loath myself for it
come over here and walk all over me...free passes available for walking all over my ass!

anyway, sometimes when I'm talking to people I just want to tell them to shut up. Like, at work, this person keeps talking to me on breaks and they say the same thing every day. Literally THE SAME STORY everyday

and in my head I'm thinking, "yeah, yeah...shut up. just shut up. I wonder why this person won't just shut up." and I'm nodding my head and smiling on the outside.
but inside I'm all, "give it a break. Go away and talk to that brick wall over there. Shut up"

uhhhhhh

2005-06-13T14:52:00.000-06:00

I need sleep
I can never sleep

This whole weekend I've felt like crap
like someone beat me with a bat, stuck needles in my eyes, and then verbally assaulted me
I'm looking forward to going to work tomorrow like I look forward to the dentist

I'd like to do something impulsive like keep driving down the calgary trail until I reach the airport, instead of turning off on 51st to go to work.
Romantic things like that don't work in real life though, I guess. You can't just up and go to Europe.

I'm sick of this, though.
'keep hangin in there', I say to myself, 'you'll get a chance to do something you love'
'screw you,' I respond 'like anyone will ever want to cut an album of your 1997 emo slowcore acoustic crap.
What else am I good at? working in a lab?
It's as good as I can think of what to do with my life. But now I gotta wait until next year to go NAIT. Another year of this in-limbo nonsense. Getting cut down at a job I don't even care about.

I'd like to have a cottage on some big-ass orchard where I could write a novel, maybe.
Eat apples an' shit

Crazy inward days

2005-06-11T16:25:00.000-06:00

This has been a nice, semi-productive saturday.
It's going SLOW
damn..the time in between 8:30am and now(4:30pm) feels like a week unto itself.

But what is stranger, when I stopped to think about it, is that since I said "thank you" to my hairdresser for "dressing" my hair, I have not spoken to a human being ALL DAY

I'm just existing here in my own little world and my own weird thoughts and my freshly prepared Seasame Tereaki, which is not too bad.
Damn, a little lemon and poultry spice can do wonders for a boneless breast.

I started trying to write another song, but it's depressing and soul consuming work..this one. The words that spewed from my mouth sometimes concern me.

I watched some season 5 Soprano's and now I want to join the mob again.
Diggity! I wanna get Made!
They should have terminology like that in work too. It would be so much cooler to get "Made" than PROMOTED
what kind of 'dingey' ass word is that? PROMOTED
Sounds like the first name of some killer robot from a cold distant planet.

PROMOTED SARRIOUS would be his name
assassin for the Gainshare Empire and part of a long line of killer robots able to reproduce sexually. He has one weakness of course.
ROCKS
just throw lots of rocks at the bastard.
he hates kids

a short story for Marc

2005-06-06T22:58:00.000-06:00

Ah. yes! let me tell you a tale about, King Hermadottious and his 8 swan's a'kindling

They burnt bright so that the night's were a'glowin!!!
Sara, the one With a case of the 'short's" was there: with her 3 friend's a'glimmerin'...

The first friend was named: Roncho McRonald. and he Had 4 eye's a'shimmerin
the 2nd was - of cours. Shear's Hamwing's, reknowned amongs the 6 Warrior's a'flakin
and: finaly; There was the legendarie Potboy le Bellyrascal. He owned the 8 swan's and endowed on them their magical power's. 5, all told
5 power's a'broodin

The end

I Ain't No Beanbag

2005-06-05T11:24:00.000-06:00

so today I'm 24
if I had 2 birthdays a year I'd be, like, 48 now

REVIEW: The Graduate

2005-06-01T22:16:00.000-06:00

I never noticed how, at some angles, young Hoffman looks like Alan Cummings

anyhow...obviously, I really enjoyed this movie. Hilarious and sincere all at once, it takes a situation that would make for light laughs on a sit-com and explores every awkward nook and cranny.
Even though it was released in '67, if has the feel of a modern, 'new-wave' movie.
Time changes and scene cuts are used brilliantly, for example.
actually, there isn't much bad I can say about this movie...aside from the soundtrack. 'let's see how many time we can fit Sound of Silence and Scarborough Fair into 2 hours!'

4.5 MILF's/5

REVIEW: The Night

2005-05-30T21:23:00.000-06:00

If I had to choose between living the rest of my life in the night or in the day, I'd go with the night. Everything is more beautiful in the night; even when it's dismal and raining. Nighttime is the artist, daytime leaves nothing to the imagination.
Nighttime is seductive
Daytime is relentless pornography
The only drawback is that it ends and I have to wake up into the damned sun. It shows all my flaws...like the nosehair that needs trimming

Rating: 4.5 Coypu's/5

Monday Morning

2005-05-30T07:06:00.000-06:00

The worse mornings are the ones where you wake up, take a second to orientate yourself, and then think, "oh shit"
For no one reason in particular

My thoughts summed up in verse

2005-05-26T22:34:00.000-06:00

"I went looking for a job and then I found a job
and heaven knows I'm miserable now"

REVIEW: whole safeway chickens

2005-05-25T22:41:00.000-06:00

under 10 dollars
good for eating immediately, while warm
good for future sandwich meats
no blood!

on the downside, it doesn't really age well. After a week it gets kinda pasty

RATING:
4 still-born chicks/5

Welcome!

2005-05-19T22:54:00.000-06:00

Welcome to my new BLOG
Probably only 0.0002% of the whole world will ever see it...and I'm quite sure my math is a little off there, but oh well...who need's people?

dogs, maybe...but who cares about dogs?

anyway, I'm still trying to figure out what this will all be about
the purpose of it
the Raison d'etre

I'm thinking of reviewing albums every couple days...throw in some pouting, lamenting, gnashing of teeth...and you got just about every BLOG every created

but for just one moment try to imagine gnashing only your top row of teeth. If somebody only had one row of teeth, how would they gnash them together?
To me, this creates a very funny mental image, which is no doubt enhanced by the Pilsner in my blood.
ah, my crutch..how I both love thee and hate thee